Sunday, June 08, 2008

Why I hate Paladins


Too long don't read version:
Blizzard loves Paladins.

I've got time in the world of Azeroth so let me swallow your republican bull nonsense coherent essay version: 1.02
I started playing WoW as a dwarf hunter. Yeah that was a total noob ritual, nothing but dps, shooting, loot ninja-ing and fighting with other dpsers to get into groups for UBRS. Then I craved more, a greater sense of responsibility and became a priest. By being the best healer class I thought it would be ideal in 5-mans and perhaps even the Molten Core and Blackwing Lair sessions. But it was a wrong move. Patch after patch and suddenly Paladins in plate armor can heal 3x the effectiveness of a priest. And they have plate armor. But they roll need on cloth items because? "They need the intellect."

So after going to my health club to calm down(JCO Donuts) I decided to make a change and become a tank. I chose a Warrior because, as stated they are supposedly the best tanks in the game. It was fun, the introduction of the Burning Crusade expansion really tested the mettle and it has never been more exiting to run groups into instances for loot. Then for some strange reason Blizzard got their minions together, dug each others noses and thought for a long time... on how to ruin a completely great balance.

Abracadabra.

Because of some dirty trick that can make chicks pregnant, paladins in addition to healing, dpsing, rein as the best multi-tanking class. Players prefer to have Paladins to tanks in 5-mans because of that capability. The only bloody capability that is ideal for such dungeons. Warriors, originally the class for Tanking now comes 2nd to them. Priests, the ones to be as a healer rank is remains on the same boat as a tentacle of a silver jellyfish. In other words the current view of the situation is:
  1. Pallys are the best Healers
  2. Pallys are the best Tanks
Sad but fucking true.

Being best at everything destroys the rest of us, the specialists classes. We got no purpose anymore. You got LFM players typing, "LF 1 more tank Pally pls no War", this is upsetting because now you put me on the sidebar. Again.

So I will resent your presence. I hate you for replacing me as the group's main healer. And I hate you for doing it again by making others prefer you as a tank. That's right. Thank you for fucking me up twice.

But hey... your armor looks kind of cool.. I like the sparkles.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dude, i dont know where you got your facts. Paladins are supposed to be a "defensive, melee fighter" and as of patch 2.3 are just BECOMING viable tanks for five mans and specialty fights. Try looking at 25 man and beyond content and see how rare pally tanks are. Oh and by the way Paladins have no HOTS, area healz and only have 2 healing spells, plus we cannot rush in commonly when healing. Other healing classes can use ranged offensive spells from far away while healing. If a paladin needs on a cloth item then the PLAYER is an a hole. Paladin damage- Lol. The lowest of any class. Try playing a level 70 paladin and you will see.

Peace

E3102 Gamma said...

Is that so? I've partied with them in 25 mans and 5 mans, guildies prefer them because there's no need for CC and their armor makes them significantly better at surviving heroics. I've seen with my own eyes why they the best class in the game. I did not say the suck, I think Paladins should count their blessings for being one of the most versatile roles.